*To those who hurt me,
Thank you for treating me badly. I know it might sound crazy to thank you, but without you, I would not be where I am today!
All of you taught me I was worth so much more than any of you can understood right now. I have also learned that many of you do not know your own worth as image bearers of God, and this makes me very sad.
Thank you for not loving me. You taught me I didn't have to perform in the circuses I put myself in to get and keep your love or attention or anyone else's love or attention for that matter. Circuses are not for King's daughters. One day you will see circuses are not for you either.
Thank you for betraying me, you showed me both who my true friends are and how broken your heart is right now.
Thank you for abandoning me, you showed me both how much God never left me and how you have not had any opportunity to attach to anyone in healthy ways.
Thank you for your addictions. You showed me how much co-dependency hurts and how little both you and I understand pain and our need to heal. I hope one day you will see that your addictions only hurt you more. They will never heal or soothe anything away. I am not and never was the answer to your addiction. You are not and never were the answer for my pain.
Thank you for using me, you showed me that I am neither your toy nor your muse. For you see, I don't belong to you. I belong to the King. I hope one day you will know Him like I do. This is my prayer for you.
Thank you for not being my friend, you taught me to value my true friends and to be a better friend where someone can receive that friendship. I learned that you don't know how to be a healthy friend because you haven't really had any healthy friends.
Thank you for stealing my time, my money, and my energy. You taught me to guard all three well and to be wise with who and what I give my resources to.
Thank you for your accusation, lies and gossip, you taught me that unkind words come from a broken heart. You also taught me I am not defined by what you say about me.
Thank you for trying to control me, you have taught me there is no such thing as control. Control is an illusion and a lie you tell yourself to keep from dealing with yourself, your addictions, and your pain.
And finally, thank you for all of the hurt! You have propelled me into my purpose and given me a reason to find out my "why" and heal so I can help others.
If you intended ill will or spite, you have accomplished the exact opposite. I feel the most loved and valued I have ever felt in my entire life because I am choosing life, peace, and purpose; not chaos and death.
We can no longer walk the same road. We are going in different directions toward very different things. We have different values. I would be remiss in this letter if I did not say in my pain, I hurt you too. For the pain I have caused, I am truly sorry. I can't go back. I can move forward and do things differently. I am not angry. I bear none of you any ill will. I want good things and healing for you. I have forgiven you. I am free. One day, I hope you will be free too. I pray for you everyday. I am letting go now. Love lets go and sets people free from expectations, both theirs and ours. You are in God's very capable hands.
Until we meet again,
Elizabeth
*To everyone else,
This letter is not a about blasting names or humiliation. I'm honestly not into the drama that brings and more importantly, it is wrong. This is about letting go and the freedom that comes when you do, not just freedom for you but freedom for others. It is in freedom that love can work. When we set people free and step back, love (and Jesus) can work. When we forgive, we take away anger, bitterness and resentment's control over our lives. Stop texting, stop calling, stop worrying about their social media, get off their social medial, stop groveling, stop chasing love and attention from someone who is not equipped to give those things you. Let them go and let God.
Kommentare