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Writer's pictureElizabeth R Billingsley

Wishy-Washy People


Hello everyone!

Do you know or have you known any "wishy-washy" people? I know I have and I know a few now. They say they will do thing, then do another. They tell you one story and then you learn something else is the truth. They feel one way and then another way. They make plans and then are always cancelling them for some reason or another - yet that reason was not there when you talked to them only a day before. It's like they can't land in a particular place in life, they area always "up in the air" so to speak. You can't count on these people. They can't commit. They speak a language of inconsistency. You never know if what they say is true or just a version of their truth. I would also go so far to say they are not true friends, they are fake friends. I might even call them liars, although as you will see later in this blog, I am not even sure they always know they are lying. These type of people drive me crazy!

I am older and wiser now (this was not always the case) and I have chosen to keep wishy-washy people as far away from me as possible. They waste precious time and energy.

Now, let me stop at this point and say there are times things happen in life to people and they can't do what they said they were going to do - circumstances won't allow it. These are not wishy-washy people, these people are simply doing what they can with what they have at the time. I would also like to point out, we all miss things on our calendars and get our schedules mixed up. We are all human and those things happen. Mistakes and unforseen circumstances don't make a person "wishy-washy." The hallmark signs of a wishy-washy person are constant inconstistency (double-mindedness is another term) and the inability to be dependable, whether it be in word or deed. These inconsistencies and un-dependability can be in little things or big things but they are glarlingly evident.

Wishy-washy people just can't seem to help themselves and I have often wondered if they are even aware of their wishy-washiness. Do they even care? Do they know that at times they are basically lying? There are times I believe it is both learned as well as a choice - a self-protective choice it would seem that is actually self-destructive. A self-destructive choice because eventually they will run off everyone who ever cared for them because they can't or won't be consistent with truth or dependable. I have never seen a wishy-washy person who has easy relationships with others. In all honestly, I pity these people. My heart also goes out to their families and loved ones who have to watch this person slowly unravel - and yes, they will slowly unravel over time because they have two minds about everything.

I have some final thoughts and advice about this for today.

If you are dealing with a wishy-washy friend or family member, you may need to put some distance between you and them and be honest about why for your own emotional health and sanity. They really do need to know how they are affecting you. This may not be easy but I can promise you there will be more peace in your life if you do. If you are the wishy-washy person, I suggest you think very seriously about my words. I would also ask you to think very seriously about what you are doing to the people you love. Why do you do what you do? Are you in self-protect mode? Are you not aware? Have you become self- aware enough to even answer these questions? Do you eventually want to be alone or worse unravel your entire life? Lastly, do you want to change? Here is the good thing about this, you can change because you are still alive. You can deal with the emotional and spiritual issues that make you a wishy-washy person and put that behind you. You can become a better friend, spouse, parent, grandparent, co-worker, etc. You can make a different choice. You can know yourself and know what you want. I will leave you with one last question; what is it that you want from this point forward?

As you think about my questions, ponder this from James 1:8 AMP; "A double-minded man is unstable in all his ways."

You don't have to be that way. You can be stable, grounded and going in a positive direction in your life. You owe it to yourself, family and friends to think about this. What will you choose today?

Until next time,

Elizabeth


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